It is not unusual to have differences of opinion and discords in marriages. But it is not wise to continue with these differences and let them destroy a marriage. Every human being enters into a marriage with his or her own expectations, ideas, values, way of living etc. Intimacy can lead to conflicts however the good news is that these conflicts can be easily resolved. Marriage counselling can build and enhance compatibility between the spouses and help in resolving issues like :
- Frequent anger & fights
- Domestic violence
- Impending divorce
- Infidelity and extramarital relations
- Substance abuse like alcoholism
- Discord with in-laws & extended families
- Addiction & dissatisfaction
- Communication problem & personal space
- Problems with roles & dependency
- Financial problems
- Infertility and parenting problems
- Lack of ‘spark’ and feeling of staleness
- Lack of time or mismanagement of time
- Health Problems
- Feeling of loneliness & emptiness
- Discords over values & cultural issues
Benefits of counselling
Relationship counselling helps couples to know each other in a better way.
Relationship counselling helps you to clearly connect with your spouse.
Relationship counselling helps you understand that your situation is different from others and you should not generalize and superimpose problem of others on your own problem.
Relationship counselling helps couples connect efficiently with each other without fear of hurt or insult.
Relationship counselling helps couples to get a clear picture of people and situations, and understand how they really are instead of having a view influenced by prejudice and misunderstanding.
Relationship counselling helps a person to discover a unique and sensible meaning of a relationship.
Reconnecting to your spouse
In the beginning of every relationship we tend to focus on the positive side of the other person. We also tend to ignore his or her negatives. In the back of our head we all know that there could be some problems that come up because no one is a perfect man or a perfect woman.
Years or months after a couple starts a relationship, the opposite happens where the couple focuses only on the negatives and ignores the positives of the other person.
These two factors can destroy any genuine relationship. I am not suggesting that you do not fall head over heels in love but I would like you to see the other person in a way that you focus on their positives without mixing it with their negatives.Love-hate- kindness-anger-compassion-rejection-togetherness are the feelings which are generally mixed up. We should try to view these separately.
How can counselling help
Consultative Psychological Counselling involves breaking our roadblocks and problems in a continuous and systemic manner. We sometimes do not see the light at the end of the tunnel as we are too intensely engrossed in our own problems. A trained professional can analyze situations and work with us to solve problems through a path which we cannot chalk out ourselves.
When or at what stage should marriage/relationship counseling be initiated? If I am having problems in my marriage/relationship where do I stand ? Can my problems be solved ? I do not see a solution ? Where am I ?